Welcome, Baby Goldilocks!

Well, looks like Stone already gave you the stats on Goldilock’s Sunday morning arrival. For those of you die-hard readers out there, details follow.

We are so happy to have her here, safe and sound. And, despite the fact that we have already had one preemie, we were still surprised that she decided to come 5 weeks early. As you know, I was gearing up for a full-term delivery, already profoundly grateful that we had made it well beyond The Nog’s 30-week mark.

I had read the VBAC Companion book and Stone and I were both optimistic about giving the VBAC a try. We even attended the doula open house at Holy Cross Hospital (ironically only one week before she was born) and signed up for their service, in the event that the vaginal delivery did come about.

My next goal was to try to ease her into turning head-down. Well, I tried the little exercises that are commonly suggested for encouraging babies to turn. I also tried playing music “down low” to entice her. However, it was all for naught.

At 3:00 am on Sunday, MY WATER BROKE! I’ve never had that experience before. It was interesting. When that happens, you don’t even really have time to think about what to do next. I remember the urgency of trying to figure out what to do, but not being able to concentrate on the next step because of all that gushing out of control. As soon as I realized what had happened, I knew I would be having surgery that day because I knew the baby was still not head-down.

We made it to the hospital and to make the long story short, Goldilocks was born via c-section at 6:57 a.m. Having already done this twice, I knew what to expect, which is both good and bad, I guess. As I was sitting on the bed in the FREEZING COLD (as always) operating room, waiting for the spinal, I was overpowered with the sentiment….

“I hate this.”

I just kept praying that we would be okay. It’s so hard not to think of all that can go wrong when you are placing your life in the hands of other human beings; particularly the anesthesiologist and obstetrician doing the surgery. (The latter of which commented to a nurse before the surgery something-or-other about his “45-year-old eyes.” Not a good idea when your patient is still awake.) However, I muddled through it with Stone holding my hand in one of his and the camera in the other. Of course I will spare you the gory pictures, though it is quite fascinating to see pics of the baby just seconds after emersion from the womb.

When she finally came out and I heard her little tiny voice squawking, I was so happy. I forgot for a brief moment about all the discomfort, tugging on my belly, nausea, nervousness, and trauma to my body. It’s amazing to me to realize that when you hear and see your baby, you really do start to think it was all worth it. And it is.

As they were weighing her and doing the initial checkup, I thought to myself that I would be happy with anything over 5 lbs. Imagine my delight at the pronouncement of 5 lbs 12.4 oz!

Based on the experience I had with The Blond Guy, I told Stone that this time, no matter how much I am throwing up, I want him to make sure I get to hold the baby as soon as possible after delivery. This is the first time I’ve been able to hold my baby within an hour of delivery. She was even still covered with goop when they handed her to me all wrapped up. In the post-op recovery room I was able (with a LOT of help from Stone) to do the initial breastfeeding attempts, intermittently with vomitting (which lasted for the next 18 hours). But I’m still so happy that I had that chance and now, even though she is so tiny and gets tired so quickly (after only 5 minutes of nursing), she can latch on and nurse pretty well. Amazing.

One of my favorite things in this life is introducing my new baby to the older sibling(s). It’s such a tender moment. I love it. Weston brought the boys in on Monday morning and I was not disappointed.

The boys were so sweet and happy to meet their new little sister!

Well, this hospital stay has been great and everything but….we’re ready to go home!

So nice to be home in your own bed, isn’t it?

I am so grateful for this new baby and I just want to express that I feel that my prayers have been answered. The Lord has taken care of us, as we’ve prayed all throughout this pregnancy, asking him to bless us with a whole and healthy full-term baby, a safe delivery and good outcome. As I said before, there is so much that can go wrong…every baby that arrives here safe and sound is a miracle. It’s hard, during those last few months of pregnancy with delivery pending, not to freak out about the potential of life-threatening disaster. But I feel this has been a good exercise in faith, patience, optimism, and trust in the Lord. We are so happy to have our new baby girl.

The reason I'm NOT going to work today

Goldilocks
Born August 24, 2008
6:57am
5lbs. 12 oz.

Shout Out To Wolverine

Last night we learned that our friends K and C (as we’ve affectionately come to know them through AJ's blog) delivered their beautiful little boy, known in-utero as Wolverine, about 11 weeks early last weekend. K and I shared due-dates around the same time and have loosely been following each other through our pregnancies.

As I sat rocking Adam before bedtime I was thinking about Wolverine and I started to remember back to those weeks we spent in the NICU and the subsequent months afterward which could effectively be summarized by one word:

STRESS

How much did he gain today….Why can his lungs not tolerate his feedings…What are his O2 stats…Alarms…...Will he ever be able to feed without causing us to panic…Is that nurse going to make him go blind by giving him too much pure oxygen….let’s try the nasal canula instead….Can he even handle 2cc milk increase every day…Back and forth to the hospital twice a day…we are exhausted….will he ever be interested in nursing…..time to pump AGAIN?...Will he be able to sustain his body temperature outside the isolette…Ok, so now he’s anemic….and an infection in his nose…and some abnormality or other on his brain….oh yeah, and I’m also recovering from major surgery and am in severe pain…spiraling out of control….

I sat with all these memories flooding through me and dearly wishing there was something I could do to help K and C. Clearly nothing….but the thought occurred to me that I have mentioned on several occasions that I wish someone had been able to show me a picture of what Adam would look like 6 months or a year later. Either I wouldn’t have believed it, or perhaps it might have comforted me a little bit to see a picture of such a “fat, dumb, and happy” kid…knowing that he really was going to be alright.

I determined to take this opportunity to do my maiden voyage with Windows Movie Maker, as I’ve been telling myself (and Angie) I would do for several months so I can learn how to use the software.

So without further ado, here’s our shout-out to K and C, and Wolverine. Actually, I am painfully aware that with a running time of 8:20, this movie is much too long for its originally designated purpose. But, it is what it is. I hope you won’t be annoyed with me. And not that I’m expecting that seeing a video of some other kid will truly relieve any of your stress, but for what it’s worth…..we are thinking about you.

I Won The Grand Prize!!!

I'm so excited, I actually won a drawing! The grand prize is a free blog makeover from HEATHER'S BLOG DESIGNS !! As far as I can recall, I don't think I've ever really won anything before.

I was looking at my friend Haleigh's blog, and she had a post about this drawing that anyone could enter. (At the time I didn't know that they are sisters.) I figured, what the hey? I'll just enter and see what happens. We could definitely use some cutes-ifying of our blog, and I'm way too inept....but mostly too indecisive to try to attempt it for myself. I'm even having a hard time picking which paper I want to start with.
But I just wanted to share the good news. And give you a heads up that my blog is going to be very cute, very soon. You should go check out Heather's website to see what kinds of things she's done. I really like her style. Thanks, Heather!

VBAC, Anyone?

Yesterday at my OB appointment, my doctor told me that I should consider whether or not I want to try to do a VBAC (Vaginal Birth after Cesarean) with this little girl.

I'm still in shock.

This hasn't even been on my radar since the emergency c-section I had with Adam. My second c-section. The word on the street is that two c-sections is just too risky to try to deliver vaginally after that. No doctor has ever given me permission to even think about it until now.

My First Cesarean
(The one where I was awake, which was suprisingly less traumatic than the one where I was completely knocked out.)
The happy new father and son in the foreground. Me suffering in the background.

My doctor said that two conditions have to be met in order for me to try it:

1. The baby has to be head down, which is obvious, but still necessary to mention because my abnormal uterus (septated) makes the chances of that lower than normal. But she was head-down yesterday so maybe it is possible.

2. I have to go into labor on my own. Again, with my abnormality, he's not willing to take the risk of inducing labor.

I was actually going to try to do a VBAC with Adam, but then he was born via emergency c-section 10 weeks early (because I had a placental abruption), so that put an end to that idea, as well as any hope that I would ever have an opportunity to deliver vaginally. Ever.

Then, in between that time and when my sister Angie had a VBAC, I must have heard some nasty horror stories about them because I was really, really nervous for her. I was praying fervently that she would be ok. She seemed really confident about it, however. She said she had a really supportive and experienced doctor, and she also had a book called The VBAC Companion that she found really helpful and encouraging.

So I'm still not sure how I feel about it. My plan is to read the book and see how I feel after that. Right now I just have the list of pros and cons running through my head: "Well, I've been planning on a c-section all along...it seems like the "safe road," with less risk to the baby if we just cut her out.....but, it would sure be nice to be able to walk after I have the baby and not be laid up for 6 weeks (if it's even possible)...but I'm not really excited about adapting my mind and my body to all those labor pains. I'd kind of gotten accustomed to the idea of not ever having to do that....but, it would sure be nice to be able to walk after I have the baby and not be laid up for 6 weeks....and to be able to even try to nurse the baby immediately afterward, which I've never had a chance to do.....but on the other hand, I don't even really know what the risks are. Going into the realm of vaginal delivery opens up a whole new arena of horror stories I've heard. Not to mention the abnormal uterus and cersarean scars I already know might pose some risks. Ugh. But on the other hand, if I can do a successful VBAC, that might increase the likelihood of my body being able to handle having more than one after this. I dunno....."

I'm sure the list will grow once I start to study up on it. Anyhow, your comments are much appreciated. Especially if you've had a VBAC before. How did you prepare? What risks were you concerned about? Did you feel that it was really, really dangerous up until it was all over?

NESTING, Baby!

I’ve got the nesting bug pretty bad these days. Aside from buying a few pink onesies, the very first thing on my list was to make a girly version of this precious, fluffy quilt that my awesome sister Becky made for me when Peter was born. This quilt has been cherished, snuggled in, and dragged around by both of the boys for three and a half years, now.

Peter at 4 months















Peter with his girly cousins



Adam still snuggles in it every time he goes to sleep. It’s the ultimate comforter.

We’ve enjoyed this blanket so much that I wanted to try to copy every detail as much as I could. Printed white top, solid back, shimmery yarn, and a triangle border. (By the way, Becca, I finally bought my own rotary cutter. Are you proud of me? After doing all those squares I can’t believe I ever lived without one.)

So last week I used my maiden voyage with our new fabulous babysitting co-op, dropped off the boys (thanks, Anna!), and enjoyed a leisurely visit to JoAnn’s all by myself to get the materials.

By the way, for some reason, whenever I walk into JoAnn’s or A.C. Moore I am just flooded with this feeling of joy. Does anyone else get this? It’s kind of weird, I think….since I don’t even consider myself to be a “craftsy” kind-a gal. But for some reason it makes me really happy to wander around and look at all the stuff that I could make, even though I completely don’t have the time, money, energy, or even the aptitude to do it. Even if I leave empty-handed, I still feel fed. Weird. Please comment.

We had Weston’s parents in town last week so I set my sights on getting the quilt done in time to have my sweet mother-in-law help me tie it.

And here’s the finished product. How’d I do? I’m pretty happy with it.

Now it’s on to the next thing. I’ve got the nesting bug so bad I even made a list of all the stuff I want to have ready before the baby comes.

Receiving blanket
Blessing dress
Moby wrap
Bassinet sheets
Binkies/Diapers
Baby book and Calendar

It actually seems kind of weird since Adam came so early that I basically didn’t have anything ready.

Aliens

We found these goggles in the dollar section at Target. They were meant to help keep Peter from freaking out when we rinse his hair.

Peter has succeeded at keeping his intact and wore them for swimming lessons every day last week. He loves them...even though I'm not sure how effective they really are.

Sadly, Adam broke his within 5 minutes of taking this picture, which was within 5 minutes of taking them out of the package. Now, whenever he sees Peter's goggles, or whenever anyone even mentions the word goggles, we are engaged in a 20-minute conversation about how Adam's goggles are broken. It goes like this:

Adam (pointing): "goggoes....boken...."

Me or Weston: "Yeah, are your goggles broken?"

Adam: "Yeah, goggoes....boken...."

Repeat